Refusing To Let Your Circumstances Define You

Yesterday I bought my first luxury car…

…but this was something more than just an automobile purchase.  It was a milestone event.

Yesterday was a celebration of a long and often difficult journey through circumstances I wouldn’t wish on anyone, but that so many of us face.

Let me set the backdrop for you…

In 2007, I had relocated to Corpus Christi, TX to lead a struggling church.  In the Fall of 2008, the church came to a point where they could no longer sustain their ministry and their staff, so I found myself unemployed.

As I prayed for direction, God led me to act upon a dream he had placed in my heart…planting simple modeled churches.  He also impressed upon me that I had to walk this out by faith.  This meant no returning to the steady paycheck of the corporate world.

At the same time, I still had a home for sale in Pennsylvania.  While it had been on the market the plumbing had been stolen twice and now the roof was in need of repair.  I had already put $25,000 into repairs since we had moved.

By January of 2010 we were homeless and moved in with friends.  This would be our living arrangement for 20 months.  I had to give my pickup to my oldest son, because he needed a car and I could no longer make the payments.

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At the same time, I felt led to begin building a home based business as the funding mechanism for my ministry and as the means of supporting our family.

Fighting The Poverty Mindset

When all of these things happened, I quickly realized that the real battle wasn’t getting on our feet again.  The real battle was the battle of the mind.

Those first few months were not easy.  The bill collectors called daily.  The demand letters arrived with more frequency and the temptation was simply to accept that I was a “poor man.”

I would love to tell you that every day I was victorious.  The reality is that there were many days I made a choice to dwell in that impoverished mindset.   Fortunately, God placed people in my life who were not willing to let me stay there long.

Each day I made a commitment on taking action.   This blog is part of that action plan.

I realized that my circumstance was simply my position on the map at any moment in time, but it was never the definition of who I am as a person, nor does it determine my ultimate outcomes.

Choosing Not To Settle

Over the last 3 years, God has blessed me greatly.  The experiences of homelessness and lack shifted my views on many things that I had never really considered.  I was able to experience God’s provisions in ways that I could never have experienced if I had been through that journey.

That being said, as we have moved through to the other side of that wilderness experience, there was one last battle that needed to be fought in my mind.   This was a battle of settling for second best.

I can look around me and know that I have been successful.  My family has had a home for well over 18 months now.  Our bills are paid and most of our debts have been paid off.

That being said, when it was time to go car shopping I found myself battling the urge to settle.   We had finally narrowed it down to 2 cars:  A Mercedes C230 and the Infiniti Q45 you see pictured.

Both cars were of approximately the same age.   The Infiniti was much nicer and drove better, but the Mercedes was less money.   As my wife and I drove we discussed the cars and I found myself starting to lean towards the Mercedes because it was less money.

Fortunately my wife asked me one of those penetrating questions that brings great clarity:  “Which car do you really want?”

I told her I really liked the Infiniti…so she followed up with “Then why are you settling for second best?”

Isn’t my wife amazing!

She was absolutely right.  I was going to settle.   So I made my decision…no holding back, I was going to get what I wanted.

So yesterday, I bought the Infiniti.  No loan and no car payment.  A milestone indeed.

Don’t Miss Out On The Second Chances

The home business arena is filled with second chance comeback stories just like mine.

If you’re needing to make a comeback, I want to introduce you to a community of people who have refused to allow their circumstances to define them.   Click the banner below to discover your second chance.